Understanding Social Anxiety in Children
It’s often easy to overlook the idea that some children might struggle with social anxiety. We often assume that kids can get along with anyone and make friends easily. Social anxiety in children is more common than most parents realize, and it can deeply affect a child’s confidence, relationships, and school experience.
At SoCal Child Psychology in La Jolla, we often see children who seem “shy” on the surface but are actually struggling with social anxiety disorder, a pattern of intense worry about being judged, embarrassed, or rejected. Left unaddressed, this anxiety can limit friendships, affect classroom participation, and make everyday experiences feel overwhelming.
As a parent or caregiver, it’s important to understand the symptoms and potential causes of social anxiety in children. By paying attention and recognizing the signs, you can help your child get the support they deserve from an early age.
What Causes Social Anxiety in Children?
There are a variety of factors that can contribute to social anxiety in children.
Some kids might have a genetic predisposition. That doesn’t necessarily mean your child will have anxiety if you have it.
However, they might be more likely to develop it if there is a family history of anxiety or other mental health issues.
More often, however, social anxiety stems from environmental factors. Family dynamics, peer pressure, and negative social experiences can all contribute to a child’s anxiety in social settings.
Every kid wants to fit in and be accepted without judgment. If they’ve experienced rejection, either at home or in peer groups, it can cause them to become fearful about being judged, so they withdraw from social settings. As a parent, if your child frequently avoids social situations or seems distressed around peers, it’s worth paying attention.
What Are the Symptoms of Social Anxiety in Children?
Social anxiety symptoms can vary slightly from person to person. They may manifest differently in a child than in an adult, because children aren’t always able to fully regulate or articulate their emotions.
From an emotional standpoint, you might notice that your child wants to avoid social situations.
Perhaps they struggle with public speaking, or they experience anxiety when interacting with others.
Social anxiety isn’t simply “being shy;” it is rooted in fear and worry, and if your child is concerned that they’ll be judged or embarrassed, consider it a red flag.
Social anxiety can also manifest itself physically.
If you notice that your child experiences things like trembling, sweating, or talks about having a stomach ache in social settings, they could be struggling with social anxiety.
Though it’s a mental health issue, it can feel so overwhelming that it causes physical distress.
The Lasting Impact of Untreated Social Anxiety
If your child isn’t able to work through the effects of social anxiety, it can impact their lives now and in the future.
It’s so important for kids to form healthy relationships. This kind of anxiety throws a wrench in that process.
It can make it hard for them to make friends, keep them distracted and fearful at school, and cause problems with communication.
All of these things can lead to isolation and loneliness, which often trigger other mental health issues.
How Parents Can Help A Child With Social Anxiety
As a parent, it’s difficult to see your child struggle with social situations. Supporting a child with social anxiety starts with validation and connection. Let your child know that their feelings are real and that it’s okay to feel nervous. Here are a few practical steps:
First, make sure they know that their feelings are valid and that there is nothing “wrong” with them.
Encourage open communication and avoid judgment as they share their fears with you.
Seeking professional help through therapy for anxiety can make a big difference. Therapy will help your child develop healthy coping skills.
Practices such as deep breathing, mindfulness, and other relaxation techniques can go a long way.
Therapy will also help your child better understand where their anxiety stems from.
By prioritizing your child’s mental health now, you’ll help them develop a lifelong understanding of how to maintain their overall well-being.
Don’t wait for your child’s fears to become worse. Contact us today to set up an appointment.
When to Seek Professional Help
If your child’s anxiety is interfering with daily life, whether they’re avoiding school, crying before activities, or withdrawing from friends, it’s time to seek professional support.
At SoCal Child Psychology, our child therapists in La Jolla and San Diego specialize in helping anxious children build coping skills, self-confidence, and emotional resilience.
Through play-based therapy, CBT for child anxiety, and parent guidance sessions, we teach kids how to identify their worries, challenge anxious thoughts, and practice relaxation techniques such as deep breathing and mindfulness. Parents learn how to support their child between sessions, creating a team approach to progress.
Child Therapy for Anxiety in La Jolla
No parent wants to see their child held back by fear or constant worry. At SoCal Child Psychology, we help children across San Diego feel calmer, safer, and more confident through compassionate, evidence-based therapy.
At SoCal Child Psychology in La Jolla, we offer child therapy for anxiety that helps kids across San Diego feel safer, calmer, and more confident. Through play-based strategies and proven therapies, we teach children practical coping skills they can use at school, at home, and with friends. Parents are also included in the process, so you’ll have tools to support your child along the way.
Contact us today to learn more about anxiety therapy for children in San Diego and how it can bring peace back to your family.
Frequently Asked Questions About Social Anxiety in Children
1. What are the early signs of social anxiety in children?
Early signs of social anxiety in kids often appear as avoidance or physical complaints. You might notice your child avoiding eye contact, refusing to attend birthday parties, or becoming extremely quiet in group settings. Some children experience stomach aches, trembling, or sweating before social activities. If your child consistently avoids social interactions or expresses fear of being judged, these could be early indicators of social anxiety.
2. How do I know if my child is shy or has social anxiety?
While shyness is a normal personality trait, social anxiety goes deeper—it’s rooted in fear and distress rather than preference. Shy children may warm up over time, but kids with social anxiety experience intense fear or worry that doesn’t fade. They may dread speaking in class, avoid making friends, or experience panic-like symptoms in social settings. If these behaviors are affecting your child’s happiness or school performance, it’s a good idea to seek a professional evaluation.
3. Can kids outgrow social anxiety?
Some children may become more confident as they mature, but untreated social anxiety can persist into adolescence and adulthood. Without support, these kids often continue to avoid social settings, leading to low self-esteem or depression. Early intervention through child anxiety therapy helps kids learn coping tools and gradually face their fears in a safe, supportive environment.
4. Where can I find child anxiety therapy near me in San Diego?
If you’re in La Jolla or the greater San Diego area, our team at SoCal Child Psychology offers therapy specifically designed for children with anxiety. We provide both in-person sessions in La Jolla and telehealth sessions for families across California. Through evidence-based approaches, we help kids feel calmer, more confident, and ready to connect with others again.