How to Cope with the Pressure to Get Into a Good College
If your teen has started the process of applying to colleges, or they’re just starting to look and already feeling overwhelmed, you’re not alone.
Coping with that kind of pressure is important. It also requires you to maintain a healthy perspective and focus on personal growth.
Every year, many teens in San Diego and across the country struggle with the pressure to get into a “good” college. The process can bring on intense stress, anxiety, and negative self-talk before the first application is even sent.
Why College Application Anxiety Happens
The transition from high school to college is filled with uncertainty. Teens often feel that their entire future depends on the outcome of a few applications.
Common causes of college-related anxiety include:
Comparing themselves to peers
Pressure from parents or teachers
Fear of rejection or failure
Unrealistic expectations for what “success” looks like
While these feelings are understandable, chronic anxiety can make it difficult to focus, sleep, or enjoy everyday life. That’s why learning healthy coping skills now is so important.
Prioritize Self-Care
College might be the first time in your life when you’re out on your own, taking care of your needs without the help of a parent or caregiver.
Now is the time to start practicing self-care, so you can manage your well-being when you step out into the real world on your own.
Self-care looks different for everyone, but you should prioritize it, especially when you’re dealing with stress.
Things like exercising, getting enough sleep, and eating healthy meals are all simple ways to take care of yourself.
To bolster your mental health, try journaling, meditating, or practicing mindfulness.
These things will help you stay grounded and make it easier to combat negative, anxious thoughts.
Set Realistic Goals
Don’t let the application process get away from you. Start applying to your schools of choice early so you don’t feel rushed or pressured.
More importantly, make sure you’re setting realistic goals and expectations.
Align those goals with your strengths and interests.
You can apply wherever you want, of course, but consider which schools might be the best fit based on your academic strengths and the major you want to pursue.
If you start to feel overwhelmed, break down your tasks. Cutting things down into manageable steps will make it easier to get them done and will keep you motivated to keep moving forward.
Look at the Big Picture
College is one chapter of your life. While it’s a big one that can have a lot of influence on your future, it’s essential to look at the big picture, rather than getting locked in this moment.
It can be tempting to focus on colleges with prestige, but you’ll reduce your stress and likely have a better experience if you apply to schools that seem like a more natural fit for you.
Studies show that it’s better to be a big fish in a little pond rather than a little fish in a big pond.
It’s important to find an environment where you feel confident and competent.
Divide your applications between your dream schools, target schools, and safety schools.
Having a well-balanced application pool will give you a variety of options when it’s time to make your selection.
Remember, rejection is not a reflection of your value, worth, or even your abilities.
Seek Guidance
If you’ve found yourself struggling throughout this stage of life, it might be time to consider reaching out for professional help. Getting therapy for anxiety can make it easier to manage negative thoughts.
Therapy can also help you better learn what triggers your anxiety while providing healthy, effective ways to cope with it.
Those techniques are something you can take with you to college as you start that new chapter.
You don’t have to go through this process alone. Leaning on your support system can be a big help. However, it’s often extremely beneficial to talk to a professional who can guide you along the way.
Teen Therapy for Anxiety in San Diego
The teenage years are already full of change — when anxiety is added, daily life can feel unmanageable.
At SoCal Child Psychology, we specialize in teen therapy for anxiety, helping adolescents in La Jolla and San Diego build skills to calm worries, manage stress, and feel more in control. Using evidence-based approaches like CBT, we empower teens to face challenges at school, at home, and with peers.
If your teen is struggling with anxiety, reach out today to learn how therapy can provide relief and support. Together, we can help your teen feel more confident and resilient.
FAQ: College Application Stress and Teen Anxiety
1. How do I know if my teen’s college anxiety is serious?
If your teen is having trouble sleeping, withdrawing from friends, or showing irritability and frequent worry, it may be more than normal stress. These are signs it’s time to seek support.
2. Can therapy help my teen feel more confident during the college process?
Yes. Therapy teaches practical skills to manage anxiety and reframe unhelpful thoughts, helping teens focus on progress rather than perfection.
3. Do you offer online therapy for teens in California?
Yes! SoCal Child Psychology provides telehealth therapy for teens across California, making it easy to access support even during busy application seasons.

